Does Searching for Love Ruin the Magic?

Photo by nuakin

Someone recently confided to me that he wanted to find love, but wasn't going online because searching for love seemed unromantic.  He wanted destiny to lead him to his person.  He wanted love to find him.


He also lamented that nothing was happening in his love life.


Is searching for love unromantic?  
Does it reduce something that could be magical to something mundane, like a job search?  
Is it a pushy way to interface with your destiny?  
Or is it smart, a sign that you know what you want and are proactive about getting it?


It's true that some people find their life partner without having to even think about it.  (One lovely couple I know met when they were young kids and grew up knowing that they wanted to be together.  So sweet, like a movie, no?)


But if you are single right now and ready to find/create/be in a life partnership, chances are you've had to face the idea of a search in some form or the other.


Here's my take on things.
The magic is in being with the person you love and who is right for you.  Hands down.  How you find that person doesn't matter one bit.  It doesn't matter whether you find each other by chance, whether your aunt's brother's friend's co-worker sets you up, or whether you meet online.


But if you're ready to find your life partner, and you haven't met that person by chance, then I think the other two options are a good idea.


To me, the least magical thing is being with the wrong person.
The next least magical thing is sitting at home and waiting for someone to knock on the door.


It reminds me of the story about the girl in dire financial straights who prays to God to help her win the lottery.  Every night she prays and every night someone else wins.  In desperation she prays: God, what's going on?  I'm about to lose everything I have.  Please, please have mercy on me and let me win the lottery tonight.  To which she hears a booming reply, "MY DEAR, PLEASE BUY A TICKET!!"